Glasses

This is Jon Mark showing me what my pupils were supposed to look like in that lighting.

These are my alien eyes.

Now, for a few photos of the "pre-glasses me".



Alright, about twenty years ago (give or take a few), I came home from school and told my mom I needed glasses. My friends were all getting glasses, and they were fussed over considerably... "Katie, can you see from back there? Maybe you should move to the front." "Mistie, I love your new glasses!" "Wow, Tiffany, those red frames are amazing." Etc. I knew that in order to "need" glasses, you had to have headaches, complain about not being able to see the board, and it was necessary to pretend like you didn't want them. So, taking all of these points into consideration, I was capable of really selling my mom on the notion that I did, in fact, need glasses. A trip to the eye doctor ensued. I literally cheated on the eye exam, I was careful to miss a few letters here and there and complain about it being a tad bit blurry, and it paid off. I needed reading glasses. Thus came about my first pair of glasses. Having been born with a guilty conscience (and perhaps the novelty of it all wore off), I confessed my sin to my parents.

Fast forward about fifteen years or so later... I was a young adult, and I needed glasses. I was still on my parents plan and set out for another exam (after having convinced them that I had done some maturing over the years and was not lying this time). Again, I needed glasses. But, I never wore them because they gave me headaches. It turns out that you have to wear them for a few days non-stop to let your eyes get used to them. Go figure.

Now, I needed glasses again. A third trip to the eye doctor (without having done anything mischievous like cheating) confirmed what I already knew. I need glasses, my eyes are moderately bad with astigmatism (shouldn't it be an astigmatism grammatically?). Anyway, with the help of a four year old, I picked out some very, very basic frames that I am to wear always. I don't know how I feel about it. I mean, I know no one is going to start calling me "four-eyes" or anything like that... but glasses??? I don't know. Someday, maybe we'll afford to get me contacts and I'll be able to get over that weird reflex that happens every time someone comes near my eyes with their finger (the doctor had to try five different times to get the drops into my eyes without me blinking)...

On a side note, no one told me that the drops they give you to dilate your eyes would obscure one's vision. I drove myself to the doctor people. It was NOT safe for me to drive home. Anyway... Next time you see a picture of me on this blog, I will probably be sporting some new glasses.