A Fun Photo Sessionr

If you know Lindsay, you know she loves taking pictures.  These photos will show you just how talented she is!!  I couldn't be happier with the way they turned out.  She's quite good!

I have found that although I am a mother to four children, each newborn experience is unique.  Joshua was a very pleasant baby.  He rarely cried, and when he did, it was more of a "hey, guys, I don't want to bother you, but could you come over here please?"  I held him almost all day long because I had nothing else really taking up my time.  I sang him so many songs and read him so many books.  I made sure he learned his ABC's and numbers by the age of two.  I made up errands just to get out of the house.  It was an easy transition into motherhood, all except for the sleeping bit.  Joshua was not a good sleeper.  That was partly my fault.  I had much anxiety over his safety at night, and if he slept for more than a few hours I would rustle him awake just to make sure he was still breathing.  I remember one night I was holding him and I noticed just how much he had changed over the course of his short 4 week-old life.  His features changed so fast I swear I could see it happening before my eyes.  I cried as I sang him the song "Turn Around" with the lyrics: Where are you going, my little one, little one?  Where are you going my baby my own.  Turn around and your two, turn around and your four, turn around and you're a young boy going out of the door...  I cried because at that moment, I realized that life moves swiftly when you have young children, and as much as I sometimes wanted to hold on, I couldn't.  I've heard it said that it's ironic how women were designed with arms that were meant to hold, only to learn how to let go...

Then, Mercedes came along.  I was so excited to have a girl.  Before falling asleep at night, I would dream about what our talks together would be like, and I looked forward to dressing her up in all of the cute clothes I had gotten.  When she was born, I was amazed at how beautiful she was.  However, I hadn't anticipated how having two kids would be a little more complicated than having just the one.  I felt guilty because I didn't have the time to just sit around and hold Mercedes like I did with Joshua.  I needed to balance time between both kids, and a lot of times one, or both, children were crying.  But, I adjusted and life became normal again.  I learned quickly that Mercedes was a bit of a firecracker when compared to docile Joshua.  I came to admire that drive in her, and I hope I'm doing my part in directing that fire in a positive manner without extinguishing it.  It's a fine balance.  With Mercedes, I was less concerned about racing against time to have her memorize her ABC's and numbers.  I realized that if she knew them by the age of two, that would be awesome.  But, if she didn't, well, that didn't mean that I was a failure as a mother.  I was also surprised by how much she learned just by observing her older brother.  Don't get me wrong, we still read books and sang songs, but I didn't stress about it.  I nursed Mercedes in the laying down position and have used that position with Luke and Hannah as well.  I loved laying down with her because it required me to go into a quiet room, away from distractions and noise, and time kind of stood still as I stroked her face and admired her.

When I gave birth to Luke, I was away from family.  We did have a lot of visitors those first couple of weeks, but after he was a few weeks old, the family visitors left.  Three kids wasn't difficult for me to adjust to.  Jon Mark was home a lot in the beginning, and I think that helped.  I loved holding Luke on my chest, and I did so every chance I got.  Perhaps that is why he is my most cuddly child.  I loved listening to him breathe.  I loved feeling the rise and fall of his little chest.  I loved his big eyes, even though they were usually filled with green goop, and he spit up A LOT!  But, covering the floor with blankets solved that problem.  He was delightful and pleasant, and I have to say that he was probably the easiest newborn that I had.  Time sped up even faster with three kids.  The three of them became friends, and I love it when there are moments when they are all playing together.

Then, Hannah Banana came along.  The timing was crazy.  Life was a bit hectic.  I had to learn to trust Heavenly Father that all would be okay no matter what the circumstances brought us.  I saw what Jon Mark was made of throughout the roller coaster pregnancy.  And, let me tell you, he's made of pretty good stuff.  

When I saw Hannah for the first time, my first thought was that she had her own look about her.  She was beautiful, very pink, with lots of dark hair.  She learned how to nurse really fast, really well.  I never got sore because she was just so good at it.  She loves being held upright, she loves to look over my shoulder.  She's absolutely precious and I am so thankful that she's mine.  I had polyhydraminous with her, and my belly still looks pregnant because of how big that condition made me.  Sometimes I feel discouraged about it.  But, I look at her and remember that the sacrifice is always worth it.  She's been a pretty happy baby.  She loves being swaddled and held.  She loves her swing.  The other three love her so much.  Life is beautiful.  

I love being a mother to these four children.  I love how these pictures captivate the beauty and innocence of a newborn baby.  I love how Lindsay was able to capture my relationship with Hannah.